12 Step Programs have been criticised in the past for reinforcing the 'addict identity'.
Members are
encouraged to think of themselves as recovering addicts. Sobriety is
treated in the same way as remission from any incurable disease. The
understanding is that the individual could relapse at any time. The problem is
that the individual’s sober self image is still tied up with alcohol or drug
abuse. Some people who break away from programs like 'AA' claim they want to give
up the addict identity as well as the substance abuse. Members of 12
Step groups would claim that such criticisms are unfair and that the program
helps many people achieve lifelong abstinence.
Dave became
alcohol dependent after working in London for 3 years, previous to that he hardly
drank alcohol or had any addictive traits. Dave was surrounded by his
colleagues and felt he wanted to fit in. A drink at lunchtime and after work
each day became the norm and the way to do business and feel accepted.
Dave
eventually realised he had a problem after logically adding up all the units he
drank every week compared to the recommended amount a male should consume. He
was also starting to have arguments and problems at home with his wife as she
was feeling neglected.
Dave attends an AA meeting, they tell him he is powerless against this addiction and that he will always be a recovering addict... Is this correct? Is he getting the right help... the right message?
Does Dave
need to stay away from alcohol forever?... Or learn to deal with the emotions
behind the drinking? Or even just stay away from the group of colleagues that
he felt pressure from?
Should Dave instead discover his self-esteem and
confidence so that the risk of peer pressure doesn’t affect his decisions?
Many people
in re-habilitation would argue he must be treated the same as all people with
addictions regardless of how it started, what triggered it, their upbringing,
whether they are surrounded by it, peer pressure, emotional stresses past and
present, learnt behaviour and learnt mentality regarding substance abuse and
for how long they’ve had the problem.
In my opinion, there are too many grey areas with addiction whatever form it takes, but one commonality is that it’s linked to emotion. What has worked for many of my clients is focusing on the emotion and just exploring how life would be without the addiction. With motivated interviewing and investigation of their thoughts, emotions and memories that the addiction tends to numb for them, they begin to realise that they CAN face their issues, and generally the addiction starts to fade along with the emotional healing.
Dave was
stuck in a vicious cycle where he felt emotionally drained from his wife being
constantly upset and angry and the pressure from the boss to go for another
drink. Dave felt threatened that he may lose his job if he didn’t conform. Dave was
drinking to numb and forget the pain and pressure but ultimately the alcohol
was a big catalyst towards Dave’s unhappy marriage. Dave was afraid to face his
wife and face his boss with his low self-esteem and confidence. With work in
therapy, he learned to recapture his confidence and felt he could say no to his
boss and spent the extra time at home reconnecting with his wife.
Therapists: Always
take a record of how much substance the client is taking for their safety and
others around them, and suggest they seek help from their GP for safe reduction
and quitting. If the client is heavily taking substance, the best route might
be to enter a facility for their own safety.
If you or
someone you know is suffering, don’t hesitate to contact Sam at
www.therapyforlife.co.uk
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